10 Reasons to attend the Chicago Outfit Home Opener, THIS SATURDAY NIGHT
This Saturday night is the Chicago Outfit's Home Opener. I. Am. So. Stoked. You should be stoked too, and here are 10 reasons why you should halt everything and show up at the league's first 2011 bout in sweet home Chicago.
10. If you’ve never been to the roller derby, you don’t even know what you’re missing. Quit being the only lame-o in Chicago who hasn’t enjoyed the athletic spectacle of hot women, short shorts, fast skates and big hits. Next time someone mentions roller derby, instead of responding “I’ve heard of that…like that movie with Juno?” you can say “Roller derby? You mean like the Chicago Outfit?” And unlike the roller derby you remember from TV and movies, this violence is ALL REAL.
9. THREE. DOLLAR. BEER. Where can you find drinks for that cheap on a Saturday night in Chicago? I’ll tell you where. The Windy City Fieldhouse. And have you ever combined beer and Sweet Mary Pain? You should really try it.
8. NEW Uniforms. Who can resist a woman in uniform? Outfit ladies look good all day, every day, and we look even better in our stylish and sexy new uniforms! Don’t miss their Chicago debut! Hint: black + spandex.
7. NEW Merch Designs. The Chicago Outfit wants our fans to look as stylish in the stands as we do on the track, so we designed some new shirts that are similar to our uniforms! Put it on and you’ll instantly feel like a part of the Family. Of course, we will also be have our sexy calendar, awesome logo t-shirts (now available in ladies fitted sizes!), hoodies, buttons and stickers. A hot Chicago summer is coming quickly, so you probably need some new tank tops and some super useful drink cozies.
6. NEW Charity Partner. This season, the Outfit has paired up with Howard Brown Health Center, one of the largest lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender organizations in the nation. Partial proceeds from all of our home bouts are sent their way, so when you buy a ticket, you not only get to enjoy the amazing sport of roller derby, but you are also helping to eliminate disparities in health care within the LGBT community. Cool, huh?
5. Rock n Roll National Anthem and Hip-Hop Half-time Show. King Sparrow, an awesome asset to Chicago’s music scene will perform the National Anthem. Unlike Christina Aguilera, singer Eric Georgevich knows all of the words. The half-time show will knock you off your seat, and will feature dance moves by The Puzzle League Dance Crew and Chicago Onyx Dance Alliance. They move in ways that you’ll have to see to believe…way more exciting than wardrobe malfunctions.
4. DIY Vendors. For this season’s home bouts, we’ve paired up with awesome local artists and DIY vendors who will be selling their wares directly to you! Buy comics, prints, tees and more and avoid the shipping fees of ordering online. Here’s a taste of what these folks have to offer:
3. Support the underdogs. The Chicago Outfit has only recently become a member of the Womens Flat Track Derby Association, and we’ve jumped up to ranking 9th in the Midwest, and number 22 in the WORLD. That’s right, Chicago’s “derby little secret” ain’t a secret much longer. Get your tickets now so you can tell your friends “I saw the Outfit before they were national champions.”
2. The Afterparty. There ain’t no party like an Outfit party and the Outfit party don’t stop…. til 4am. Take the free party bus from the Fieldhouse to the Cobra Lounge and celebrate a good ol’ American victory over Canada. Meet the Family, give us high fives, and enjoy awesome drink specials. (Did someone say cheap whiskey?) Sure, you’ve seen us skate, but you haven’t experienced the Outfit until you’ve joined us on the dance floor.
1. This is the year of the Outfit. If you’ve seen us play in the past and you think you know what’s in store, think again. The world of roller derby is talking about us, and you will too. The Syndicate is burning up Derby News Network power rankings, and laying out every team we’ve played this season. The Shade Brigade redefines what it means to be a “B Team.” We’re good. We do the damn thing. And we don’t feel the need to be modest.
Chicago Outfit Home Opener
Doors at 6:00pm, Bout 7:00.
Locate your local roller girl and pay $15 for presale tickets or $20 at the door. (Bout tickets can also be purchased online and picked up at Will Call).